Good morning. We’re sorry to hear of your death! However, death is not the end but instead a new beginning. Before you died, you selected to enter the ‘Earn Out!’ program. This program will give you a new life, with a job, education and whatever other options you selected.
Perhaps you wanted to live in the Sea of Tranquility or on Io. Perhaps you wanted a husband and three children. Perhaps you wanted to know how to play piano in your next life. All of these things are possible (not all these things are probable).
The Earn Out! program differs by corporate provider but the commonalities are these:
- You died
- You signed up to Earn Out! and gain a new life
- This free service sees you earn out your new life through a period of service to the corporation whose policy you signed up to
You have been selected for the Hostile Negotiation Team of [redacted]. This is a highly prestigious opportunity sought by hundreds of thousands and offered to just a fraction of that. It means you’ve passed out psychological testing, our ethical standards and have impressed our analysts with your previous life (sorry, but your memories were not part of the reclamation package).
The job you will do is dirty with long hours and uncertain outcomes but you are flexible, a team player, adaptable and a self-starter who has demonstrated a strong ability to also work on your own within a fixed, rules based system.
If you should fail, we will ensure you get a second chance. A third chance. In fact you will get as many chances as you need to Earn Out!.
As part of your program you will be interviewed so we can use your image in future content and, if you perform, you may well get to meet people who have already Earned Out!
Good luck - may your program be a short one.